Autumn In New York

Autumn is among us and I am loving it. Friday I got caught in the rain- in my ballet flats, black cardigan, too large leather doctor-like bag, and flimsy umbrella. I got wet. I was heading home from Elexa's and didn't pack any weather gear besides the umbrella so I had to do my best. Luckily I'm only 3 train stops away from her. I was able to appreciate the wet beauty around me while my feet turned to ice and my perfectly blown out hair started to curl. The orange leaves are beautiful wet and pressed onto the sidewalk, children leap over the puddles, people look a little more picturesque leaning on the side of the bodega doorways staring out at the weather.

Today I am very happy because my bed has arrived, now I can stay full time in my new room. It's been one long slumber party at Elexa's! It is nice to have my own corner of the world to retreat to (no matter how much I love falling asleep giggling next to my dear friend). My room is quiet and grey- but in the best possible way. My cousin, Ryan who I am so grateful to have in my life helped me assemble the bed frame and set everything up. Ikea is not always the easiest.

It's a bit late for me to be blogging... but I wanted to finish my thoughts for tonight and send this out. I'm currently in the middle of establishing my new routines anyways... it takes a while to settle in a new place. It's grounding to know that I can settle in this room, at least for a little while. I love being free to go wherever I want whenever I want, like a Gypsy... but I can't deny that inner need to nest or settle. To give both parts of me peace I am trying to find a middle ground. Trying to own few things helps a lot. It does feel very important to keep some special things to establish that feeling of being "settled". I have a few belongings that I can pull out, put on a window sill or bookshelf and I automatically feel like I'm home. Home is an interesting concept, home is where the heart is, right? I feel home in New York because I'm following my heart... but my heart is definitely in many places. My heart is with my younger sister and family in the Bay, my older sister and her family in Hawaii, Spindrift School of Performing Arts (SSPA), my darling Jake, and my heart is always with my Parents who are with God. Despite being so far away from so many of my favorite people I do not feel lonely. I tell myself I will see everyone in December when I visit next, and it's hard to feel too sad. I have some incredible friends here in New York and in some ways I have befriended the city.

I don't want to offend anyone by my next statement... but New York is nothing like people told me it would be. Some things here and there- but it's not what I was expecting. Some of you may not know- but I had never visited New York until I moved here. I didn't advertise it because I didn't want anyone telling me I was making the wrong decision. I knew it was right for me and it didn't matter that I had never been here before. It still doesn't matter. I have fallen in love with this place... it's almost more of what I dreamed it would be then what people told me. Now I know what you're thinking- I should't be talking because I haven't experienced winter yet- but I'm saying all of this anyways. I have only been here a little over a month and already so much has happened. It hasn't all been perfect, but I'm still happy. I think of it this way... I have already gone through some of the hardest times in my life. Not much will compare to the loss of my parents or the way I lost them. Going to New York to become an actress seems small compared to those hard times. I like to think my life is like a fairytale that way,   all Princesses have tragic starts to their stories. I like to Play Princess but I think I face my life like a warrior. This is the type of outlook I need to power through an audition, heartache, financial trouble, the never ending cat calls, and sometimes just a tough day.

Tonights blog has been a bit of a life update... I am so happy to share my life on here and I hope you are happy to read about it! I am so grateful for the outpour of love and support I have from my beautiful friends and family members. Thank you. Whenever you reach out to me on Facebook, texting, Instagram, etc. it means the world to me. Thank you for the all of the love- I feel like the luckiest girl in the world. Truly.

-Is